Any other women here feel like this is happening? I am 45 and I've started noticing these last couple of years that no one looks anymore. I used to keep myself in shape, always dressing nice, making sure I have makeup on, not being in public/grocery store with gymshoes on, etc. But but it seems lately that no one even cares. I've put on 10 pounds over the winter, but I'm not even motivated to workout anymore and fight the battle of the bulge. Sometimes I wonder why I even bother coloring my hair, which has to be done almost every 2-3 weeks (roots) otherwise all thise gray pops out.
What a drag it is getting old.
Why do you worry about who is looking at you. We mature adults are supposed to be way past that kind of insecurity. I'm 53 and know I look great. I really don't give a rat's *** about whether some stranger on the street is impressed
Wecome to the club, Suzy! It happens to all of us sooner or later, LOL I solved the hair-coloring issue by letting the hair go gray completely. I wear it rather long and I get incredible compliments at my age about my naturally gray hair. No more expensive hair treatments for me. LOLThese days my appearance only needs to please me, LOL, and while I don't "work out" per se, I do lots of activites which involve vigourous movements, like mowing the yard with a sef-propelled mower and working in my flower, perennial and garden beds. When I go shopping I always park some distance from the store's front door and briskly walk to wherever I need to go, and when I go back to my car loaded down with shopping bags or pushing a cart, it's a wonderful aerobic workout. There are other ways to "fight the battle of the bulge" without going the route of the gym that are much more interesting than waiting for someone else to finish with the exercise equipment you want to use.
Also, you might sign up for a water aerobics class. That's an incredible work out, LOL. I just started about a month ago and my muscles are just now getting accustomed to the extra activity, LOL. As to the motivation problem, if you're having fun with it you'll find the motivation to continue the activity. The secret is to make the workout fun!
As a man I can tell you it isn't easier. Walking down the avenue and seeing my reflection in a store window and thinking my father is here. Yeah....
MY TVC 1 5
I have developed more skill in not being noticed when looking at women as I get older. And older women are usaly who I look at AND who I don't care if they notice me looking at someone else. And people usually gravitate toward there age or mentality.
Chances are you might not be as quick to notice, especially when you are looking for it.
And if they were looking once, conceder yourself lucky you had it, what is that about loved and lost..... agree or not, at lest you had a point in your life where you "had it going on."
If that doesn't help.
Let's look at this scientifically.
Youth is what is considered "typical" beauty. What resembles youth will be looked at more often when it comes to living things. I.E. A woman who has features that resemble children get looked at. I sounds "creepy" but it is true when talking about the face. Look at why women get collegian injections - and that theory is what I am doing a bad job of explaining. It kinda bothers me too. I remember a special about this on TLC.
Hosted by John Cleese, fantastically realistic views. Not everything you necessarily want to hear but the truth is what it is.
The amount of "good looking" has increased by extreme amounts in the past couple of decades - even with the weight issues that seem to be prevalent in the news, faces are more commonly "good looking." The competition is fierce do to the activity of earlier generations.
You may not resemble anyone famous (anymore).
You might not be showing as much skin.
Just a few thoughts and I wish I could have had Tom Selleck's issues, but oh well.
~ Figure Skating Is My Passion ~
Rooting for the divas with Kwanford
Ladskater, you're a "mam"?!
I also started to experience this invisibility thing. It is a little unsettling to have something that you consider an annoyance irk you a little by disappearing. It turns out to have been a not insignificant part of our identity that we eventually have to let go of. Fortunately, there is a pretty long middle period where you can be a good looking woman of a certain age (when you're in the mood to make the effort) en route to becoming an elegant old one.
Having older friends who enjoy being old is a big help. A dear friend now 82 always says, "I knew I would love being old and I do!" I still don't quite get why. I think it is no longer caring what people think of her. And no longer working at a job she disliked. And having grandkids. And doing all the things she loves that she didn't have time for before. And thinking it all over.
ETA: Your post sounded a bit down. I hope the moral support helps. Feel free to PM me if you want to go on talking.
Last edited by Spun Silver; 06-01-2006 at 12:52 PM.
Mick & Keith are now in their early 60s and are not living up to those words...Nor is Pete Townshend living up to his "Hope I Die Before I Get Old" phrase.
Originally Posted by Suzy
Consider yourself lucky that there at least was a time when people looked. That's an adjustment I'll never have to make. I was just as ugly when I was in my early 20s as I am now at 48.