- Joined
- Aug 18, 2003
Doggygirl - I am glad that you and your Mum managed to reconcile your differences over your choice to quit your sport.
I have a good friend who is a very very good swimmer - at sixteen she was on the reserve squad for the Sydney Olympics. And for the three years previous to that she was swimming competitively outside her age group because there was no-one to challenge her in her own. She was up every morning at 5am to be at the pool by 6am, in school by 9am and back in the pool by 4.30pm. Constantly abroad at training camps because Ireland doesn't have an Olympic size pool and almost every other wekend was taken up with competition.
One day she decided enough was enough, she had no social life, she had no time to spend with friends and no time to study so she gave it up. Just like that at 17 she decided she had had enough and wanted to quit.
To me her mother dealt with this in a way I would like to think I would, should I ever find myself in the same position. There were no tantrums, no accusations, no throwing the amount of money or time spent back in her face. Her mother realised she was old enough to make the decision for herself and all she asked was that my friend thought long and hard about what she was doing before walking away from the sport.
You give your child what you can without sacrificing everything and to me it is more important that at all times you remain your childs mother. Sometimes that means getting angry and pushing your child when they need it, sometimes it means being a shoulder to cry on or an encouraging voice when training hasn't gone well. It means telling them it's okay to miss training when they are injured or if they want to go to the prom, or that it's not okay to miss training because they want to watch tv. Telling them it's okay to go for a pizza with friends every once in a while because one pizza won't ruin their figures/diets whatever.
Leave the coaching and lecturing to the people you pay to do it and be a parent to your child - they need that more than anything.
I have a good friend who is a very very good swimmer - at sixteen she was on the reserve squad for the Sydney Olympics. And for the three years previous to that she was swimming competitively outside her age group because there was no-one to challenge her in her own. She was up every morning at 5am to be at the pool by 6am, in school by 9am and back in the pool by 4.30pm. Constantly abroad at training camps because Ireland doesn't have an Olympic size pool and almost every other wekend was taken up with competition.
One day she decided enough was enough, she had no social life, she had no time to spend with friends and no time to study so she gave it up. Just like that at 17 she decided she had had enough and wanted to quit.
To me her mother dealt with this in a way I would like to think I would, should I ever find myself in the same position. There were no tantrums, no accusations, no throwing the amount of money or time spent back in her face. Her mother realised she was old enough to make the decision for herself and all she asked was that my friend thought long and hard about what she was doing before walking away from the sport.
You give your child what you can without sacrificing everything and to me it is more important that at all times you remain your childs mother. Sometimes that means getting angry and pushing your child when they need it, sometimes it means being a shoulder to cry on or an encouraging voice when training hasn't gone well. It means telling them it's okay to miss training when they are injured or if they want to go to the prom, or that it's not okay to miss training because they want to watch tv. Telling them it's okay to go for a pizza with friends every once in a while because one pizza won't ruin their figures/diets whatever.
Leave the coaching and lecturing to the people you pay to do it and be a parent to your child - they need that more than anything.