Line 14 dogs up at rinkside. They can even be appointed by different federations, I have no problem with that, but they should be made up of at least 10 different breeds.
Attach very light-weight sensors to their tails. As each skater performs, the dogs' tails will wag in accordance to how much they like the program. The higher the speed and force of the tail-wagging, the higher the skater's score.
Scores are posted for the entire audience to see. Each dog's name and country will be shown with his or her score.
Skaters caught scenting their costumes with the aroma of raw steak will be severely penalized. Dogs caught accepting bribes of Alpo in exchange for extra tail wags will be <em>banned for life</em>, no matter how apologetic, cute and sweet they look afterwards.
That is my proposal, but I'm sure there must be others. What other alternate judging systems can we suggest to the people in charge (whoever they turn out to be)?