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Thread: "Orientation" of Figure Skaters

  1. #1
    Keeper of La Khok's Tutus Doggygirl's Avatar
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    "Orientation" of Figure Skaters

    It is with tongue firmly in cheek that I present a new perspective on FSOC (Figure Skater Orientation Concerns). This reporter believes that recent as well as historic discussions about FSSO (Figure Skater Sexual Orientation) have distracted us from MMSOC (Much More Significant Orientation Concerns).

    This reporter believes there are only three OC's (Orientation Concerns) that are truly relevant to Figure Skating. And these OC's are definitely GN (Gender Neutral).

    These important OC's include:

    VO (Vertical Orientation)
    HO (Horizontal Orientation)
    BO (OK, I know you think that's BODY ODER. Not - It's Bi-directional Orientation)

    Examples of excellent VO skaters so far this year might include people like MK, and JW. EP (well, MK too) have exhibited these VO tendencies for YEARS.

    While SA exhibited lots of VO last year, she has had some problems with HO this year. And of course there is SC who has consistently had HO problems. Tim used to be almost entirely VO but for the last couple of seasons has had his own HO problems.

    The BO category is best described by TD's. And this reporter AIN'T talkin' Football here. SC combined HO and BO problems in her USAN FS. BJ (STOP with the dirty minds, I'm talking Joubert here...) has had his share of challenges with the BO problem this year as he produced his own share of TD's.

    So. Whether you are a RFSF (Rabid Figure Skating Fan) or an AFSF (Avid Figure Skating Fan) I hope you will join this reporter in getting our eyes on the IMPORTANT O issues.

    It may not be possible to relieve the pre-World's tension, but I will still try.



    DG
    Last edited by Doggygirl; 01-26-2005 at 05:27 PM.

  2. #2
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    This is wonderful. It is a wonderful comeback to all the threads on skating boards about a skater's sexual orientation (as though that is any of our business).

  3. #3
    Keeper of La Khok's Tutus Doggygirl's Avatar
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    Just trying to lighten things up a bit...



    Dg

  4. #4
    bugs are smarter than we are bronxgirl's Avatar
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    It had me in the aisles

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    Not the droid you're looking for
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    Thank you!! Where does "disoriented" fit into this?
    Rave

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    My Apologies

    And hope the list will accept my apology on a rather poorly worded post regarding the other kind of orientation. What I meant to say is that figure skaters have a whole lot on their plate already.

    Thanx, Doggygirl, for providing such a terrific thread.

    Linny

  7. #7
    Keeper of La Khok's Tutus Doggygirl's Avatar
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    Lol!

    Quote Originally Posted by Ravyn Rant
    Thank you!! Where does "disoriented" fit into this?
    Rave
    Well, I guess that would be DO. That's what happens to me when I play the Dick Button Drinking Game during major competitions. I guess that makes DO an FOP (Fan Orientation Problem) right??



    Linny, I'm glad you too are enjoying a little OT fun. (Off Topic, Over the Top, Orientation Training, or whatever you want OT to be)

    DG

  8. #8
    ~ Figure Skating Is My Passion ~ Ladskater's Avatar
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  9. #9
    Keeper of La Khok's Tutus Doggygirl's Avatar
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    Sorry Ladskater...

    My sense of humor is OT (Out There). Don't feel bad.

    DG

  10. #10
    Not the droid you're looking for
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    Quote Originally Posted by Doggygirl
    Well, I guess that would be DO. That's what happens to me when I play the Dick Button Drinking Game during major competitions. I guess that makes DO an FOP (Fan Orientation Problem) right??

    DG
    Ah, yes! "DO" is what you get when you mix shots of brandy with shots of spins from the Smucker's Skycam. Whee!
    Rave

  11. #11
    Keeper of La Khok's Tutus Doggygirl's Avatar
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    Good Point!

    Quote Originally Posted by Ravyn Rant
    Ah, yes! "DO" is what you get when you mix shots of brandy with shots of spins from the Smucker's Skycam. Whee!
    Rave
    I was DDO (Direly Dis-Oriented) when you include the crotch cam...



    DG

  12. #12
    Figure Skating Is A Dangerous Sport Dee4707's Avatar
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    Doggygirl, are you still in the brandy???

    Your post made my head hurt.

    Dee

  13. #13
    Keeper of La Khok's Tutus Doggygirl's Avatar
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    I'm a natural goofball...

    Quote Originally Posted by Dee4707
    Doggygirl, are you still in the brandy???

    Your post made my head hurt.

    Dee
    .....no brandy required (usually).

    DG

  14. #14
    Keeper of La Khok's Tutus Doggygirl's Avatar
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    Learn something new every day...

    ....I guess HO (Horizontal Orientation) is not always a bad thing.

    http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?g=e...77&a=0&printer=



    DG

  15. #15
    Custom Title Mathman's Avatar
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    Does this orientation have a name?

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