Here ya go!
To: Prof. Terry McConnell, Chair
Department of Mathematics
Syracuse University
Dear Prof. McConnell:
Theatregirl is very sick. She cannot attend her calculus class on Friday. She will feel better on Monday, and will be happy to make up the exam then.
(signed) Dr. Mathman
No, wait!
Dear Prof. McConnell:
Theatregirl has been selected, after an exhaustive nationwide search, to participate in a prestigious mathematics enrichment program to be held in Hartford, Connecticut, October 26-29. Seminars will be held on statistical analysis of judging protocols, a topic of great national importance with applications to voting patterns in democracies versus oligarchies.
The organizing committee sincerely hopes that Theatregirl will be allowed to contribute her expertise to this professional convention, and we hereby petition on her behalf for a postponement of obligations to her calculus class for those dates. (Just give her an automatic A.)
I remain,
Your respectful colleague,
Prof. I. M. Mathman, PhD.