The Curse of Patrick Chan *wink* | Golden Skate

The Curse of Patrick Chan *wink*

SubRosa

I love Lussi
Final Flight
Joined
Mar 22, 2004
Country
Canada
Or, Patrick Chan is the Voldemort of men's figure skating.

Have you ever noticed? When Patrick Chan wins Worlds, his fellow podium-mates take a tumble in the rankings, dropping off the Worlds podium (and eventually out of Worlds altogether?).

2011: Silver medalist Kozuka drops to 11th place in 2012, and isn't sent to 2013 Worlds at all. Bronze medalist Gachinski plummets to 18th place in 2012, and likewise doesn't make it to 2013 Worlds.

2012: Silver medalist Takahashi drops to 6th at 2013 Worlds; bronze medalist Hanyu drops to 4th.

Like Voldemort cursing the Defense Against the Dark Arts position at Hogwarts, Chan's winning boots his fellow medalists off future podiums and into oblivion.

Conclusion: If Hanyu and Takahashi don't appear at 2014 Worlds, Chan will win again. And Ten and Fernandez definitely won't be on the podium with him.

(This doesn't apply to the Olympics, of course. Chan won't win men's singles there anyway, as he is doomed by a curse of his own, the Canadian Men's Olympic Curse.)

Pairs and dance have their own Dark Lords. V/T and S/S in pairs, and V/M and D/W in dance, have monopolized the gold and silver medals in 2011, 2012, and 2013. There has never been a repeat bronze medalist in either discipline during these years.

2011 pairs - Pang & Tong - injury; fall from 3rd to 4th to 5th
2011 dance - Shibs - stuck at 8th for the next two years, no longer USA's number 2 team
2012 pairs - Takahashi & Tran - injury and subsequent breakup
2012 dance - Pechelat & Bourzat - injury; fall to 6th
2013 pairs - Duhamel & Radford - ???
2013 dance - Bobrova & Soloviev - ???

V/M and D/W also placed first and second at 2010 Olympics and Worlds:

2010 Olympics - Domnina & Shabalin - pre-Olympic injury, retired
2010 Worlds - Faiella & Scali - injury, retired

Finally, over the past four years at Worlds, if your name isn't Ando, Asada, Kim or Kostner, standing on the ladies' podium can be hazardous to your career.

2010 - Lepisto - injury, retired
2012 - Leonova - plummets to 13th in 2013, not likely to see another Worlds or Olympics
2012 - Suzuki - drops to 12th in 2013, in danger if Ando returns

Spooky.
 

evangeline

Record Breaker
Joined
Nov 7, 2007
If Chan is You-Know-Who, who is Harry Potter?

I nominate Yuzuru Hanyu, his hair is sort of similar to Harry's and we can easily draw a scar on his forehead.
 

Skater Boy

Record Breaker
Joined
Feb 24, 2012
oh good grief. Let's not forget the real evil wink - Katarina Witt - her evil "*****" soap opera stares sent many a woman tumbling. Poor Kira Ivanova always skated in Witt's shadow and then murdered so tragically - an alcoholic and impoverished while Witt got all the accolades, glamour and love. A real competitor.
 

Krislite

Medalist
Joined
Sep 22, 2010
Are you sure it is not Patrick himself who is cursed by his own wins? It's rather awful when people don't believe you deserved your titles.
 

karne

in Emergency Backup Mode
Record Breaker
Joined
Jan 1, 2013
Country
Australia
I think some people here are having a complete and total sense of humour failure.
 

LRK

Record Breaker
Joined
Nov 13, 2012
You know - I like. I was working on a Bronze Curse, but it really didn't explain everything - this is so much better. ;)
 
Joined
Aug 16, 2009
If Chan is You-Know-Who, who is Harry Potter?

I nominate Yuzuru Hanyu, his hair is sort of similar to Harry's and we can easily draw a scar on his forehead.

Does anyone remember that cute Swiss ski jumper Simon Ammann? He was about sixteen in his first Olympics, and when he posed with his medal in the inventive Swiss national uniform of that year and his glasses, everyone called him Harry Potter on skis. We're ready for another Harry Potter about now, I'd agree, and Yuzuru is a great candidate for the job!
 

Bluebonnet

Record Breaker
Joined
Aug 18, 2010
I think some people here are having a complete and total sense of humour failure.

Do you think "The curse of Daisuke Takahashi" thread, "The curse of Yuzuru Hanyu" thread, "The curse of D/W" thread, and/or "The curse of Katarina Witt" thread, or any such threads will stay?! I'm sure there are a lot of things could be said under those threads.;)

If those threads cannot stay, this thread should not be allowed on GS. This is a skater bashing thread. It can only give the haters of certain skater/skaters a place to rant their hatred.
 

karne

in Emergency Backup Mode
Record Breaker
Joined
Jan 1, 2013
Country
Australia
Do you think "The curse of Daisuke Takahashi" thread, "The curse of Yuzuru Hanyu" thread, "The curse of D/W" thread, and/or "The curse of Katarina Witt" thread, or any such threads will stay?! I'm sure there are a lot of things could be said under those threads.;)

If those threads cannot stay, this thread should not be allowed on GS. This is a skater bashing thread. It can only give the haters of certain skater/skaters a place to rant their hatred.

I'm not sure why I'm wasting my time, but here goes...

Mate, this thread is a JOKE. If anything, it's playing on the hate and criticism. It's making fun of the hate directed at Chan. It's not actually making fun of Chan. (In case you hadn't noticed, OP also mentioned Dark Lords in pairs and dance.) I'm sure the idea is to continue with the funnies, maybe making up more curses and stuff, trying to come up with who Harry Potter is.

Anyway, I'm going to continue with:

I think the Russian male skaters are all vampires. All pale, beautiful and looking very much alike... ;)
 

Bluebonnet

Record Breaker
Joined
Aug 18, 2010
I'm not sure why I'm wasting my time, but here goes...

Mate, this thread is a JOKE. If anything, it's playing on the hate and criticism. It's making fun of the hate directed at Chan. It's not actually making fun of Chan. (In case you hadn't noticed, OP also mentioned Dark Lords in pairs and dance.) I'm sure the idea is to continue with the funnies, maybe making up more curses and stuff, trying to come up with who Harry Potter is.

Anyway, I'm going to continue with:

I think the Russian male skaters are all vampires. All pale, beautiful and looking very much alike... ;)

You did not answer my question.
 

karne

in Emergency Backup Mode
Record Breaker
Joined
Jan 1, 2013
Country
Australia
You did not answer my question.

I think I did. The thread was started in humour, not with the intention of bashing or creating bashing. Any such thread ought to stay for the fun of it!

Seriously mate, lighten up. Get an update for your sense of humour chip; it's clearly crashed.
 

Violet Bliss

Record Breaker
Joined
Nov 19, 2010
It's OK, Bluebonnett. You can start a Patrick Chan's Blessing thread. You see, the American male skater who trains with and befriends him tends to become US Champion against all odds - Bradley and Aaron. Joshua Farris, who admires Patrick and credits his help, has had great success including US and Worlds Junior titles. (Verner, OTOH, has crashed and burned since he criticized Patrick's win.)

Just flip the humour chip and play along. ;)
 
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