- Joined
- Jan 12, 2004
The sub-par performances of pair teams at the recent U.S. nationals means that our skaters will be needing a few good excuses to boost their morale. Just in case they need a little help, I’m offering my own list -- pair skaters’ TOP TEN EXCUSES FOR SCREWING UP AT THE NATIONALS:
[10] Distraught over Britney Spears annulment.
[9] Airport security confiscated the 130 lbs. of sequins we planned to sew onto our costumes. We just felt naked without them.
[8] All the talk about the 10th anniversary of TONYA & NANCY made us nervous.
[7] The ice was too cold.
[6] The dog ate our boot laces.
[5] Visited local tourist trap, Underground Atlanta. Got lost in maze-like tunnels. Wandered for days without water. Lost practice time. Got dehydrated.
[4] My bra strap broke.
[3] My jockstrap broke.
[2] Had to break up fist fight between Dick Button and Peggy Fleming. Sustained multiple injuries which affected our performance.
[1] We didn't want to peak too early.
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