Papadakis publishes book; Cizeron challenges claims

[TallyT]

I've often wondered what someone hopes to gain by writing a book like this - other than $$$$. In my opinion it has totally erased any good feelings of watching Cizeron and Papadakis skate beautiful programs. Slamming other skaters, making disparaging remarks about someone she skated with since she was a child, etc. Not a great legacy. I don't enjoy listening to her commentary and now the memory of those wonderful programs is tarnished. Bad on you Gabi.

She does it for her own reasons, one of which is undoubtedly money, one certainly to tell her side of the story to put history as she sees it out there because (as people who write these often feel) it is being erased by the more 'publicly personable' one. One may be for her own mental health after swallowing all this for years for the benefit of people she feels deeply hurt by. And yes, another is to snipe at those people who hurt her and (with their supporters) blandly ignore or discount that hurt and simply want the fake public image. Revenge may be less holy than turning the other cheek, but it often feels better.

Do I think it was a good idea? Probably not. Many many people write memoirs and regret burning paper bridges in them afterwards. Fans complain and feel aggrieved every time their idols don't fall into the preferred version of history line, I have been disappointed myself by some. But they do not owe us an illusion of sweetness and light because it makes us comfortable.

 

[TallyT]

Kirsten Moore-Towers comments on Canadian pairs when her own pupils are competing and is as fair as with any other skaters.

Tracey Wilson also, her commentaries when Yuzu and Javi were competing were models of grace and generosity to their rivals.

 

[FlyingFeather]

Unfortunately, most situations are not clean cut good guy/bad guy. As far as I can tell, two people deeply hurt themselves and others by hyperfixating on a goal that will never fulfill anyone, and by passing along the hatred/bullying and abuse that they were themselves victims to. There is a time and place when who should be blamed for what, and who did the most hurt, should be determined, but that does not cancel out what the victim did to hurt others. Sounds like the only one at IAM who is completely innocent is the little baby. Humanity is beautiful, but also harsh and evil. Don't know how things are in your countries, but I see it all the time in US culture. A man who leaves work promptly at 5 to go see his family, a woman who takes maternity leave for 6 months, recent college grads who wants weekends to spend with friends or pursue a hobby or go to church or have time to themselves are seen as lazy, not dedicated enough to their careers, etc. If those of us with 9-5s crumble under this pressure and take out the stress on our families and coworkers, how much more for the most dedicated athletes in the world? Especially once they get the medal and it does not fix everything inside. I felt sad after reading Gracie's book, as it sounds like healing is elusive, and I pray she and Gabi so many others can find it. But it's a mixture: angry at the ways they have hurt others, and grieving at the ways in which they have been deeply hurt. I will not be mad if Gui wins gold because it is a sport and IMHO his team has the best skating skills, but I hope he will realize that it was not worth it; a corroded soul cannot be replaced by a gold medal. I hope one day he (and Gabi and the whole figure skating community!) realize that world class skating can be achieved by people who are loving, self-giving, gentle, and balanced. I love figure skating, but these stories make me want to stop supporting it when it brings people so much pain. But I guess that does not make sense, it is not figure skating's fault...people find a way to bring themselves and others pain no matter their context.

 

[fsfs1980]

I may regret expressing this, and as someone who has experienced the trauma of abuse in my own past, I find some of these comments troubling (and a little triggering). I just want to say that no one should wonder why people often take so long to share their truths about difficult experiences because the reactions of some in this thread provide ample evidence as to why we are reluctant to do so. I, myself, am not brave like Ms. Papadakis and have kept my own experience hidden from my family so as not to have to deal with the anger and accusations of my being dishonest or worse that I'm sure would result if I did. I admire her strength and courage in finding her voice and sharing her experience, particularly when so many of us have allowed ourselves to be intimidated into silence.

 

[Dawn825]

I don't believe Gabby's book changes anything except for her. FB/C already came into this season with extremely poor personal reputations. The ppl who already didn't like them will continue to do so, the ppl who already didn't care if their fav skaters were also terrible ppl will continue to do so, and the judges whose job it is to not care whether the best skaters are also terrible ppl will continue to do so. I believe Gabby, and I also don't believe any of this will affect FB/C outcome at the Olympics.

 

[Arigato]

"I was supposed to go to Milan as a commentator with NBC," she said.

"Unfortunately, they called me a few days ago because after the cease-and-desist from my former partner, they changed their minds, which makes me very sad. I regret it, but at the same time, I knew that by writing this book, it would unfortunately affect my career. For people who speak out against systems of oppression, it never goes very well."

I have no position on the matter, just relaying the Papadakis quote.

 

[Miya88]

"I was supposed to go to Milan as a commentator with NBC," she said.

"Unfortunately, they called me a few days ago because after the cease-and-desist from my former partner, they changed their minds, which makes me very sad. I regret it, but at the same time, I knew that by writing this book, it would unfortunately affect my career. For people who speak out against systems of oppression, it never goes very well."

I have no position on the matter, just relaying the Papadakis quote.

is she serious?
her career?
what she is talking about?she thinks she spoke "against system of oppression"and thats why she is not commenting in Milan?
Anyway, I think they think she is not good enough for Olympics, thats all.

 

[auser]

I may regret expressing this, and as someone who has experienced the trauma of abuse in my own past, I find some of these comments troubling (and a little triggering). I just want to say that no one should wonder why people often take so long to share their truths about difficult experiences because the reactions of some in this thread provide ample evidence as to why we are reluctant to do so. I, myself, am not brave like Ms. Papadakis and have kept my own experience hidden from my family so as not to have to deal with the anger and accusations of my being dishonest or worse that I'm sure would result if I did. I admire her strength and courage in finding her voice and sharing her experience, particularly when so many of us have allowed ourselves to be intimidated into silence.

 

[TallyT]

Its the timing of the release of the book. If it was April, not a problem.

And why is the very correct - by any unbiased and especially business - decision to release it at a time when exposure and sales will be maximised and therefore the author benefit the most be a problem? In April, how many less people would want to read it?

As someone pointed out, the publishers made the final call.

The title of this thread needs to change.
GUI is not suing for defamation.
I believe his team is requesting a cease and desist. He's basically saying I feel I'm being defamed, I ask you to stop.
Suing is a whole other process

It'd the legal equivalent of "shut up shut up you're affecting my big pr narrative!!!"

And this may sound cynical but I actually prefer it to all the cheesy-fake "look what good pals we all are, happy for them if they beat me, besties all, where's our instagram likes???": stuff many of the singles skaters are trying to push at the minute (US women especially, I am looking at you).

 

[4everchan]

I read only bits about Virtue and Moir. I cannot say I can support her words. She doesn't seem well.

 

[TallyT]

She doesn't seem well.

You may not like what she says, but throwing this at a woman who is saying something you don't like is uncalled for and damn ugly.

 

[4everchan]

You may not like what she says, but throwing this at a woman who is saying something you don't like is uncalled for and damn ugly.

Wishing your competition to fall is uncalled for and damn ugly.

Read it.

Also, saying someone doesn't seem well is not necessarily bad. I hope she finds her peace

 

[Mathman]

t'd the legal equivalent of "shut up shut up you're affecting my big pr narrative!!!"

This is the part that is most distressing to me. The "cease and desist letter' Is most often used to bully the recipient by threatening "Ooh, you are in so much trouble now, my lawyer is about to sue you for a billion dollars and put you in jail."

(Oh wait, I think I am confusing figure skaters with politicians.)

 

[Mathman]

Wishing your competition to fall is uncalled for and damn ugly.

Read it.

Also, saying someone doesn't seem well is not necessarily bad. I hope she finds her peace.

We are not doctors, psychiatrists, mental health experts.

I can't help wondering if you would react in the same way if it were someone other than Virtue and Moir that Papadakis admitted to once wishing a hex on. But since you mentioned that the only "bits" that interested you were the passages about Virtue and Moir, well...

 

[TallyT]

Also, saying someone doesn't seem well is not necessarily bad. I hope she finds her peace

Yeah yeah. Men have forever been labelling any woman who says something they don't want said as 'not well' (aka 'hysterical', 'not rational', 'out of control', 'mental issues', 'hormones'). I repeat, you can disagree with it but reaching for that old, sexist, abusive label like men have for centuries is beneath anyone in the 21st century.

You and I have disagreed about just about everything on this board but I thought better of you than this.

 

[4everchan]

We are not doctors, psychiatrists, mental health experts.

I can't help wondering if you would react in the same way if it were someone other than Virtue and Moir that Papadakis admitted to once wishing a hex on. But since you mentioned that the only "bits" that interested you were the passages about Virtue and Moir, well...

I'' d react the same way. I only read that because that's the bits that came in my feed. I admit that after reading it, I am not interested in reading more.

 

[fsfs1980]

Yeah yeah. Men have forever been labelling any woman who says something they don't want said as 'not well' (aka 'hysterical', 'not rational', 'out of control', 'mental issues', 'hormones'). I repeat, you can disagree with it but reaching for that old, sexist, abusive label like men have for centuries is beneath anyone in the 21st century.

You and I have disagreed about just about everything on this board but I thought better of you than this.

It's a tired trope and frankly, I'm sick of it (hence my reference earlier to the TS song).

 

[TallyT]

It's a tired trope and frankly, I'm sick of it (hence my reference earlier to the TS song).

It was used to control, mistreat, sedate both emotionally and physically, and in some case incarcerate women right up until last century and still gets flung around like cheap insults.

(I am sorry to everyone else to whom this might incorrectly look like overreacting - I am not fond of Papadakis and think maybe her editor should have reined her in, though reviews elsewhere say that in French it's all more nuanced and compassionate - but this made me incredibly angry and NOT in a 'not well' way.)

(And please, most of them probably want their rivals to fall, see the old joke about Michelle Kwan. For the most part, they would be too polite, sensible and/or mealy-mouthed to admit it.)

 

[4everchan]

Yeah yeah. Men have forever been labelling any woman who says something they don't want said as 'not well' (aka 'hysterical', 'not rational', 'out of control', 'mental issues', 'hormones'). I repeat, you can disagree with it but reaching for that old, sexist, abusive label like men have for centuries is beneath anyone in the 21st century.

You and I have disagreed about just about everything on this board but I thought better of you than this.

You're totally misinterpreting me. I find it sad that she felt she was never going to be as perfect as Tessa, or that she felt the only way for her to be happy would be if her rivals fell. If that's the way she lived her career, then yes I hope she finds her peace because it's not healthy. I'm not interested in labeling anyone. I also do not feel it's ok for anyone to put me or anyone else on this forum in a group of men who are sexist or misogynistic .

 

[Magill]

Why do I keep hearing Taylor Swift's "mad woman" as I read several of these comments?

You made me go and check it as I am not the swiftie generation and yeah, now I'm hearing it too...