Hello everyone!
I’ve been a lurker on GoldenSkate for about a year now, but the culmination of a few events in my personal life over the past couple of months has caused me to finally come out with a post. It’s nice to meet all the people whose comments I’ve been liking!
I am lucky enough to have been a fan of figure skating since randomly rediscovering it in one of the YouTube recommended videos around two years ago (Gosh, has it been so long?! All the stuff that’s been going on in the FS world made me lose track of time). I remember observing Alina debut her senior programs, forming my opinions on her keeping her Junior LP, being amazed at her ability to backload all of her jumps, and watching her grow into the beautiful skater she is today. I rooted for her all of last season; I distinctly remember watching Europeans 2018 live while studying for exams and exclaiming “YES, SHE DID IT!” to a very quiet, and subsequently, very angry group of students in the library

. With each skate in the 2017-2018 season and 2018-2019, I became a bigger and bigger fan of not only her skating, but of her quiet, calm demeanor and her gracious personality.
(content warning: death, depression)
I am a high-achieving student at an insanely high-caliber university in the US, and sometimes I can’t even believe that I’m here. I’m from a very rural area, and to find myself suddenly excelling among the smartest kids in the country both surprised and overwhelmed me. While some might see it as a stretch, I like to compare my situation to Alina’s - with hard work and determination, one can achieve anything. However, like Alina, I have recently been having struggles. My younger brother passed away two months ago, and I found my entire life falling apart quite suddenly. Grades started to drop, homesickness soared, desperation set in, and before I knew it I was extremely depressed and nowhere near having the amount of fun I was having before.
But whenever I think of giving up, I always think of Alina. For various reasons that are mostly speculation on our end, she hasn’t quite been having the same season she has last year (but I mean, c’mon, she’s still doing amazing and I wish people would stop saying she’s had a “bad” season because this is far from it). From her standpoint, though, I’m sure she feels like this season is definitely not turning out quite as nicely as she’d hoped. But look at her tenacity! Her perseverance! Her desire, and sheer love for the sport! She trains far from her family, flies to competition after competition, is practicing quads, and is developing into an classy, gracious young woman. She takes each victory with humility, and each defeat with poise. I admire her strength, her bravery, and her determination. I feel as though the last year has been very tumultuous for both Alina and I, with very high highs and low lows. It feels nice to have someone to admire, to look up to, to mold yourself after, even though I’m a good 3 years older than Alina. I’m grateful for her skating, as it was one of the only constants in my life this past year. I hope she continues for a long time.
And, of course, I’m so grateful to you guys! You really keep things positive here, and you never know when someone might need that in their lives. Just as Alina has been a constant in my life, this thread's devotion to positivity while celebrating our Olympic Champion has gotten me through many sad moments. I hope this thread never changes

I can’t promise to post often, but as you can see, I’m certainly capable of posting long

. Thank you for your time, and good luck to Alina at the World Championships!