Crazy predictions thread 2018-19

[mermaidfestavol3]

1. Rika Kihira gets tired of missing her 3A and decides to add 4A, which she ends up popping to 3A most of the time. She includes a 4A+3T, 4A, 3A+2T+2Lo, and 3A+2T in her FS. Despite these upgrades she fails to qualify to the FS due to missing all of her spins and steps at Japanese Nationals and a rogue judge who gave her 0.25 in all components.

2. Satoko debuts a 4Lz+3Lz in opposite directions, which it turns out she had all this time and was saving it for the post-Olympic season for the biggest impact. After winning Worlds gold she moves to ice dance with Shoma Uno while Wakaba Higuchi and Yuzuru Hanyu move to pairs.

3. Maria Sotskova's new costume restricts her arms to her sides. Her innovative program earns 10s in PCS despite having 0 arm movements. Unfortunately, her jumps receive 0 GOE for not having arm variations.

4. In an effort to stop corruption, the ISU institutes a rule that only 1 GOE score will be given for the entire program. Xiangning Li wins the GPF jumping a program of all singles with an overall GOE of +5.

I will come up with more later after procrastinating on finals lol

 

[DaNiCG]

Yuzuru doesnt qualify for the GPF

 

[Sam-Skwantch]

Brian Orser takes lots of naps :yawn:

 

[echeveria]

Brian Orser takes lots of naps :yawn:

he deserves at least that much

 

[moriel]

ISU fixes PCs scoring. PCs now will be awarded in a fair and meaningful way.
Fans stop fighting over PCs scores received by skaters.
Peace in our time.

 

[DaNiCG]

ISU fixes PCs scoring. PCs now will be awarded in a fair and meaningful way.
Fans stop fighting over PCs scores received by skaters.
Peace in our time.

you win

 

[chopinskate]

ISU fixes PCs scoring. PCs now will be awarded in a fair and meaningful way.
Fans stop fighting over PCs scores received by skaters.
Peace in our time.

It's sad because it will never happen, so this is indeed a crazy prediction. :/

This too.

This too.

 

[libecha]

1. Eteri Tutberidze announces a hiatus from coaching to open up the first In-n-Out Burger in Moscow.

2. Eager to continue conveying a wider range of skills and to give a contrast to this past season's FS, Tarasova and Morozov choreograph a FS to "Baby Beluga" by Raffi.

3. Didier Gailhaguet retires as head of the FFSG after being offered a post teaching business ethics at IAE de Paris.

4. Attempting to bolster their international profile in the runup to Beijing 2022, the Chinese Federation announces that it has been discovered that "Yuzuru Hanyu" is actually a Chinese man named "Yu Han" who was abducted from a Chongqing shopping mall in 1997 and will soon be repatriated, in the middle of the night via military transport plane.

5. The Russians decide to provide Alexandra Trusova with more age-appropriate programs rather than things like "Big Spender." A "100th anniversary" FS is choreographed in which she dresses in a bloodstained sailor suit and pretends to be Tsarevich Alexei being murdered by the Bolsheviks in Yekaterinburg.

6. Aljona Savchenko wants to make a comeback for the 2019-2020 season but Bruno Massot is too invested in his new job as a German-language co-commentator with Daniel Weiss on ZDF and tells her no.

7. Strict cost-cutting measures are implemented at the Internationaux de France, culminating in skaters being asked contribute 150 euros each if they want the ice actually resurfaced before their group warms up, as well as being forced to return their medals 5 minutes after the ceremony so the restaurant down the block can put the foil back on the fish.

8. In order to broaden the exposure and appeal of the sport, the ISU makes a series of sensible, transparent decisions.

 

[TeamTCC]

Wakaba or Alina moving to Brian Orser

 

[chopinskate]

Some of these are just sad. :/

 

[4everchan]

Some of these are just sad. :/

why don't you write your own then ?

this is a fun thread and people express their fun to their own taste I find some of these particularly funny, especially libecha's for instance

 

[chopinskate]

I mean reading stuff like "PCS will be fixed" in a "crazy predictions" thread is sad, because everyone knows it won't happen. That's all.

 

[Neenah16]

7. Strict cost-cutting measures are implemented at the Internationaux de France, culminating in skaters being asked contribute 150 euros each if they want the ice actually resurfaced before their group warms up, as well as being forced to return their medals 5 minutes after the ceremony so the restaurant down the block can put the foil back on the fish.

Don't give them ideas please

 

[Ic3Rabbit]

Sense of humour needed here though. I love this thread and the concept.

ISU makes rule against pantomiming in choreography. One choreographer goes out of business but finds a new life and career with Cirque du Soleil.

 

[chopinskate]

Well, I'm not actually sad, either.

 

[4everchan]

I mean reading stuff like "PCS will be fixed" in a "crazy predictions" thread is sad, because everyone knows it won't happen. That's all.

some people have a darker sense of humour than others...let's appreciate everyone's input or if not, you can opt to ignore this thread altogether... i don't read many threads in this forum...by choice

 

[hanyuufan5]

Alina Zagitova and Evgeniya Medvedeva have been practicing quads in secret. They play it low-key all season, then bust out quads all over the place at the Grand Prix Final, smashing all the world records and tying for gold.

/wishfulthinking

 

[chopinskate]

some people have a darker sense of humour than others...let's appreciate everyone's input or if not, you can opt to ignore this thread altogether... i don't read many threads in this forum...by choice

It was not a really serious comment. It was more of an observation.

I don't really get sad reading threads.

 

[StitchMonkey]

Orser sweeps men's and ladies world championship podiums!

Well... he has the theoretical stable to do it.

 

[IndiaP12]

1. Eteri Tutberidze announces a hiatus from coaching to open up the first In-n-Out Burger in Moscow.

2. Eager to continue conveying a wider range of skills and to give a contrast to this past season's FS, Tarasova and Morozov choreograph a FS to "Baby Beluga" by Raffi.

3. Didier Gailhaguet retires as head of the FFSG after being offered a post teaching business ethics at IAE de Paris.

4. Attempting to bolster their international profile in the runup to Beijing 2022, the Chinese Federation announces that it has been discovered that "Yuzuru Hanyu" is actually a Chinese man named "Yu Han" who was abducted from a Chongqing shopping mall in 1997 and will soon be repatriated, in the middle of the night via military transport plane.

5. The Russians decide to provide Alexandra Trusova with more age-appropriate programs rather than things like "Big Spender." A "100th anniversary" FS is choreographed in which she dresses in a bloodstained sailor suit and pretends to be Tsarevich Alexei being murdered by the Bolsheviks in Yekaterinburg.

6. Aljona Savchenko wants to make a comeback for the 2019-2020 season but Bruno Massot is too invested in his new job as a German-language co-commentator with Daniel Weiss on ZDF and tells her no.

7. Strict cost-cutting measures are implemented at the Internationaux de France, culminating in skaters being asked contribute 150 euros each if they want the ice actually resurfaced before their group warms up, as well as being forced to return their medals 5 minutes after the ceremony so the restaurant down the block can put the foil back on the fish.

8. In order to broaden the exposure and appeal of the sport, the ISU makes a series of sensible, transparent decisions.

Omg when I saw the first one I lost it [emoji23]