Terri Shivo

[guinevere]

More spouses divorce than there are parent-child estrangements.

True, but I agree with Ptichka about the evolution of parent/child relationships, and how a spouse often supplants the parents as the main confidants of an adult. I speak to my mom on average once a week, email with my sister regularly - basically I figure I have an average relationship with my family. But they are completely out of touch with what I might be thinking about anything important. My friends know exactly where I stand on issues such as this - my family knows where they want me to stand on those issues, and nothing I say will sway them (that's why having it in writing is so important).

 

[swannanoa54]

My family actually discussed what we wanted done. And it's a good thing. Since my oldest son is married (and I might interject to an absolutely wonderful woman), it was important to know what both of them wanted done. Since the DIL had gone through everything with us regarding our daughter, she's an integral part of our family and her outlook really matters to us. It was interesting to learn that my son had never thought about where he wanted to be buried. Now we all know.

One thing that was made clear from each of our children and from us is that none of us wants to be kept alive in a PVS. However we do want all manners of therapies exhausted before that decision is made. This is because we have seen what not giving up until all avenues are exhausted can do.

I, halfway don't understand why Michael doesn't just let her parents take care of her if they want to do so. However I halfway understand that he must believe within himself that Terri absolutely would not want to live this way. While I have problems with denying someone Communion every day (and I'm not Catholic), I think he's just following the court ruling and that's not part of it.

There are so many underlying factors and issues we know nothing about that you can't really tell what's the truth and what isn't. I wish both sides would just make peace and let Terri have whatever time is left to her. It's just grown very sad, IMO.

According to the timeline, Michael and Terri's parents actually had their falling out in 1993 which is when all therapy was stopped. It's just sad. I feel so bad for both sides of the family, but mostly for Terri because this can't be peaceful even if she looks "calm" like Michael's attorney says.

 

[sk8tngcanuck]

Terry Schiavo just passed away, so ends the suffering.

RIP

 

[Aloft04]

May her beautiful soul rest in peace and joy.

And may our government forever keep the line crisp and clear between theology and law.

 

[swannanoa54]

May she rest in peace. Eternal peace and dance in the sunshine wherever she is.

 

[Doggygirl]

I have faith that Terri will rest in peace. My hope for her family is that all of them can remember her with love and fondness, and move on peacefully in their own lives.

DG

 

[NJSk8Fan]

Well said Doggygirl....RIP Terry, and may her family find the strength to move forward and get on with their lives.

 

[curious]

Well said Doggygirl....RIP Terry, and may her family find the strength to move forward and get on with their lives.

I feel terrible for her family. I really hope they find some peace in this tragedy. Terri's huband better pray nothing clonflictive comes out of that auptosy like some kind of abuse. Do you think society would have been as understanding if a woman did what terri's husband was allowed to do by the courts? anyone have an opinion?

 

[dfj]

Why would you say something like that? He is the one calling for the autopsy (which will undoubtedly show just how brain-damaged this poor young woman was).

These types of comments have absolutely no basis in fact and are just allusions thrown out there by "counsel" for the Schindlers. Sadly, people believe it. You know, tell someone something often enough and they'll buy it (ie, the Iraq WMD argument).

 

[ChiSk8Fan]

Irony

There is a kernal of irony in the way this entire, 15 - 20 year story has played out to this point. Irony in this case is based in irrefutable facts, so I can mention this irony without actually voicing any opinions on the matter. My opinions are very, very strong in this case for many, many good reasons; but my nature does dictate that I keep my thoughts to myself.

Here is the terrible irony as I see it:

1. Terry Shiavo went into cardiac arrest as the result of complications of bulemia nervosa, which resulted in such an acute case of dehydration, malnutrition and starvation that her heart stopped, depriving her brain of oxygen.

2. It took withholding food and water from her for 13 days to allow her body to die, which created such an acute case of dehydration, malutrition and starvation that her heart stopped. This time, there was no resuscitation about 15 years after the original, bulemia-complication induced episode.

The conditions which placed her in her state were used to end her plight.

Modern science, therapies, brain stimulators, medications, love, prayer, hope, courts, politicians, family----nothing changed the outcome of the effects of starvation on her body from bulemia, and starvation was re-instituted to its natural course 15 years later.

I find it ironic, sad, tragic, but in an odd sense, in-line with the dictums of Mother Nature.

 

[Doggygirl]

There is a kernal of irony in the way this entire, 15 - 20 year story has played out to this point. Irony in this case is based in irrefutable facts, so I can mention this irony without actually voicing any opinions on the matter. My opinions are very, very strong in this case for many, many good reasons; but my nature does dictate that I keep my thoughts to myself.

Here is the terrible irony as I see it:

1. Terry Shiavo went into cardiac arrest as the result of complications of bulemia nervosa, which resulted in such an acute case of dehydration, malnutrition and starvation that her heart stopped, depriving her brain of oxygen.

2. It took withholding food and water from her for 13 days to allow her body to die, which created such an acute case of dehydration, malutrition and starvation that her heart stopped. This time, there was no resuscitation about 15 years after the original, bulemia-complication induced episode.

The conditions which placed her in her state were used to end her plight.

Modern science, therapies, brain stimulators, medications, love, prayer, hope, courts, politicians, family----nothing changed the outcome of the effects of starvation on her body from bulemia, and starvation was re-instituted to its natural course 15 years later.

I find it ironic, sad, tragic, but in an odd sense, in-line with the dictums of Mother Nature.

I've thought of this often too. Never could find a way to verbalize this as eloquently as you did. Eating Disorders are SUCH a serious problem, and a problem that the people closest to you often don't recognize or understand.

DG

 

[gezando]

She is starved to death, and her husband did not even allow her family to be with her at her dying hour. :disagree:

 

[skatingfan5]

She is starved to death, and her husband did not even allow her family to be with her at her dying hour. :disagree:

Actually, her brother and sister were with her up until 10 or 15 minutes before she died. If her brother hadn't gotten into an argument with security, refusing to leave when hospice staff wanted to do a medical examination of her, they might have been allowed to stay until the very end.

 

[Aloft04]

Do you think society would have been as understanding if a woman did what terri's husband was allowed to do by the courts? anyone have an opinion?

A bigger question might be...what if this woman had been a black, lesbian, drug- addicted agnostic? Would Bush have cut his Crawford vacation short to dash back to Washington to butt in?? HAH!!

 

[Vash01]

A bigger question might be...what if this woman had been a black, lesbian, drug- addicted agnostic? Would Bush have cut his Crawford vacation short to dash back to Washington to butt in?? HAH!!

I think that's mean. I thought of Terri Schiavo (can someone correct the spelling of her name in the title?) as a living person. The race, lifestyle, or anything else did not enter my mind. Why can't you give the benefit of doubt to the people you hate, and allow them to have a kind heart? I do not share President Bush's religious or political beliefs but he and I seem to agree on this one. It is life we are talking about.

Vash

 

[Vash01]

She is starved to death, and her husband did not even allow her family to be with her at her dying hour.

I find it outrageous that her parents were not allowed to be with her in her final moments, but the husband that actually authorized the killing was allowed to. His brother's interview on CNN was ridiculous.

 

[Vash01]

I found it interesting that on last nights news report from the hospice Mr. Schiavo's representative said (not an exact quote) that the lights were dimmed in the room, there were fresh flowers, Terry had her favorite stuffed animal, they were playing "Claire d Lune", she had moisturizer on her lips and was comfortable and in no pain. Also that she hadn't had tp receive any Tylenol and for the past 15 years has had to take Tylenol for pain. Now are all of these comfort measures for Terry or window dressing for the family and staff? I don't understand what Mr. Schiavo's problem with her receiving Holy Communion as often as her priest wants to administer it? Some Catholics take Holy Communion every day. On the news it said that Mr. Schiavo was following the court orders that she receive Holy Communion before the feeding tube was pulled and one more time which was administered on Easter. If allowing her to have a drop of Communion wine every day brings comfort to her grieving family what is the big deal? It is certainly not going to provide any amount of fluid replacement/nourishment (except spiritually). This issue alone makes Mr. Schiavo look like a bully who is withholding one of the Sacraments of the Church "because he can". Makes me think his issue is more a power struggle with the parents than following what he claims are Terry's wishes. Since he has moved on with his life (including adultry) he has shunned the teachings of the Church. This does not make him the best person to be determining what is in the best interest of Terry's spiritual or physical health. Also, his announcment that he wants to have an autopsy performed to prove his point was IMO just plain insensitive to the pain her family is going through. I know that in the past her parents have mentioned the same thing. BUT right now I think timing is a critical thing. Mr. Schiavo appears to be wanting to rush things as much as possible. He just seems awfully anxious for Terry to be dead.

Exactly my thoughts. I don't have the same religious faith but I understand how her parents feel. They would have derived some comfort from the fact that she received the religious rites. If Mr.Schiavo had any compassion at all, he would have done something to alleviate their pain. I feel terrible for them because they were willing to take care of her, but the husband wanted her dead, and they were not shown any compassion whatsover. As you put it, it was about powerstruggle, and while I don't think of Michael Schiavo as a demon, he has been terribly insensitive to his in laws. The Schiavos can blame the Schindlers all they want, but their actions don't speak of caring for either Terri or her biological family.

Of course it is too late now. Terri is gone and nothing really matters. I feel very sad for her parents and her brother. I hope they can move on with their lives. It must have been such an ordeal for them.

Vash

 

[Aloft04]

It is life we are talking about.

Precisely! And here's my challenge to you..... If you and your president truly believe in the sanctity of life (and not just zygotes and people in a persistent vegetative states) then you cannot, I repeat CANNOT support the Iraq war or capital punishment. It's completely hypocritical.

We turn our backs daily on the hungry. We withhold adequate healthcare from those unable to pay. We drop bombs on children. That, Vash, is my definition of "mean".

 

[curious]

Actually, her brother and sister were with her up until 10 or 15 minutes before she died. If her brother hadn't gotten into an argument with security, refusing to leave when hospice staff wanted to do a medical examination of her, they might have been allowed to stay until the very end.

well,that's what the adulterous husband of terri and his lawyer said. If a woman would have done what this poor excuse of a husband did she would have been call everything by this lovely society. men can do everything women can't,nice double standard. and by the way,I'm entitled to my opinion something people have a very hard time understanding here.

 

[Piel]

I wonder what that last "medical examination" entailed that her brother and sister couldn't be present? Morphine anyone? Do you really think Terri would have wanted to have been cradled by a husband who had moved on in her last minutes of life? The burial/cremation issue is just cruel and mean on Mr. Schiavo's part.