I have literally nothing to add really except thanks for that post because that was probably the best I've ever seen a competitive mindset explained.
Fascinating insight! Thank you for sharing. I've honestly sometimes boggled at the fact that competitors (not just skaters) have to objectively know their chances of winning are slim, but still go out there and compete with everything they have. I think your post goes a long way in explaining that, as well as the inverse--that Yuzu must have known his chances were great, but refused to rest on his laurels.
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wow, thank you! Glad my teal deer were of service! (Funny story: my boyfriend took a loss better than I did. He’s ... good at dealing with the pressure. Me? I cried and blamed myself. The kind of person it takes to survive the pressure is beyond comprehension, and for Olympic athletes, there’s not a “normal life” to fall back to. I am very lucky my boyfriend is sane with another side of his life, or as sane as anyone can be who competes at that level, because it’s definitely a good way to lose what sanity you have.) Competitive drive is real (I keep mine in check by not going there — I worked more as a coach/commentator/researcher/talking infodesk), and the way Yuzuru talks about his ankle feels very familiar. Boyfriend is currently not actively competing while finishing his doctorate, and he can’t just “casually” compete; when you know what your best is, not performing at it is ... worse than not trying at all, in some ways. But the Olympics come every four years, which makes Olympians an even rarer breed of crazy.
The chances of winning are slim, but if you’ve ever heard someone say, “Skaters should be allowed to leave the ice after falling” — that’s the kind of statement that just doesn’t make
sense to a top competitor. You can make the most devastating mistake, but there’s no time to truly
think about it while you’re in competition (you can beat yourself up about it for a year after you’re done); it’s a trait that has ... good points and bad. (... when a pseudo-lawyer and a competitive genius quibble over word choice: three hours of verbal trench warfare! Hot dictionary on thesaurus action!) But the idea of giving up or not finishing a program when you know you’ve won is ... literally unthinkable, in that it’s a thought that cannot naturally occur. It’s anathema to what makes competitors what they are.
By any conventional metric, what Yuzuru did was irrational, even crazy: risking further injury in pursuit of a medal, allowing him to tie Button’s record and — I honestly think he wanted this the most, though I have no special insight — skate two clean programs for the gold rather than win the way he did in Sochi. And I wouldn’t be surprised if he tries again in Beijing precisely because injury means this Olympics is forever an asterisk, a sort of “what if” — what if I hadn’t been injured? What if I could have actually prepared? What if I’d been able to truly show what I know I’m capable of? I may very well be wrong, and I’m not suggesting I think he’s a lock four years from now, just that I suspect that even with this kind of ridiculous accomplishment — what he did in spite of his injury is frankly ludicrous, even before you consider the podium placings — there’s still that drive to do better. (When I said Orser is going to have to drag him off the ice for his own good one day, this was what I meant....)
Yuzuru does leave a fair number of clues, though they may require a second watch. Off the top of my head: describing Fernández as almost too nice to compete; “I bet my life on these Olympics”; revealing that the pain reduction was actually only at 20-30%; the way he pressed his forehead against the rings in the Olympic ice after his free skate, completely spent; “I don’t even care. I’m doing me” when asked after the short about how he felt about his chances for the gold.... The last one is more nuanced, but the others are pretty straightforward, I think? The comment about Fernández is especially revealing, since it came after he said he wanted to talk about how important a friend Fernández is and how much he respects him, and I don’t think for a moment that was meant as an insult. It’s just... very indicative of the competitive mindset: even though we all rise together, when we’re all improving and pushing the sport, at the end of the day, only one person is awarded the gold, and there are no medals for kindness. (I think my boyfriend is what would happen if Javi and Yuzu raised a child together... and I’m only realizing that now.) Sort of how it’s not exactly “playing dirty” to evade being honest about the state of your 4Lz, but it’s certainly a competitive advantage.
And this is still a guy who described the 4Lz as being like a cat! I... think Yuzuru is Yuzuru: in some ways, he’s guileless and a dork (the headdesk!), and I have no doubt his friendship with Javier is genuine, that he’s actually a nice guy — there are way too many non-self-serving moments that have been captured when he had no reason to believe they would be for me to think he’s an inauthentic jerk. But he’s also been living under the pressure of a nation for most of his life, he’s extremely talented (and he knows it), he’s easily the most complete skater of the last two cycles and has redefined what’s possible for Asian skaters and men’s skating more broadly, and he wants to win. You don’t risk skating with that kind of injury unless you’re some kind of crazy, and, well, he is. And outside pressure. It’s more than any one person should have to bear.
You have to wonder how any of them stay even remotely close to sane, rather than beginning from the presumption that they
are.