Translation: Kanako MURAKAMI official retirement message (translated by
yui on tumblr)
Today, I, Kanako Murakami, have decided to retire from figure skating after 19 years of competing.
Although it’s been 3 years since Sochi Olympics, I haven’t been able to leave the results I expected to leave and it made every day very hard on me. As for last season, I couldn’t get to the results I wanted no matter how much I practiced hard. Sometimes, I felt like I didn’t know what I was doing all this for. But I had a strong determination that I couldn’t end this the way it was and that’s what kept me going until now. Before last year’s nationals, I set my heart on doing a satisfying performance that could also be my last one. Since then, I thought a lot about what is a satisfying performance for me.
As a result, after speaking to my coaches, I felt the importance of skating in a way that would remain in the hearts of the people who came to watch, even if that required lowering the level of my jumping passes, which was a regretful decision as an athlete. Then, I concentrated on training while keeping in mind that objective.
After the competition, a lot of people congratulated me by telling me “It was great!!” and mostly, I saw my coaches being happy for the first time in a while and that filled my heart. Since then, it felt like a string that was under pressure let go. I thought “… let’s end here” from the bottom of my heart and I made the decision of retiring.
When I think about it, my skating career had a lot of ups and downs, and I caused a lot of trouble for the ones supporting me. I am very sorry about that. But all your rooting has been a big support for me, and moreover, my biggest motivation. I am so thankful, I don’t know how to express it in words. Thank you so much for all your support until now.
From now on, I want to be involved with figure skating in many other ways. I will work hard as an adult part of the society so people can support the new Kanako Murakami. Please take care of me from now on too.
Murakami Kanako