Plushenko's divorce

[Zanzibar]

...and I don't think I ever saw taking care of someone one I loved as a "burden."

I would completely feel that if my daughter were to have to take care of me with advanced Alzheimer's for a decade - and possibly beyond - that it would be an incredible burden to her. Especially, if I were to suffer from it to the degree my Mom does and not even recognize my daughter for the better part of that decade. It's a horrible disease - the person can't communicate - you have no idea what their wishes and thoughts are. It's soul ravaging. Eventually they can't eat because their brain can't remember how to swallow. Bowel control went years ago. Pneumonia comes and goes and each time it's life-threatening. Their personality all but almost vanishes with just an occasional glimmer every now and then to remind you of the person you once knew. I don't care if you're a frickin' saint...I would never wish it on my daughter. It is devastating emotionally, physically, financially and...well...devastating in every way imaginable. I am the luckiest Mom in the world to have the daughter that I do, and hopefully my Mom felt the same way...but I would pull the plug myself before ever subjecting my daughter to it. My siblings feel the same way.
Long-term advanced Alzheimer's is the most destructive disease I've ever seen - it pales compared to watching a parent wither away dying slowly and painfully from metastatic cancer - and that was the benchmark before Alzheimer's became the new benchmark of horror.

Concerning Plush, of COURSE I don't think he's perfect - I'm joking - and making a joke does not necessitate the use of blinders. I've had a long education in the faults and foibles of Russian champions...of course he's human....I just like, respect, and enjoy his skating to a degree above most other skaters, and find him to be a careful, loyal person to his friends.

 

[Dee4707]

To Nan and Zanzibar, you are both correct. 3 of my siblings and me have been taking care of our mom for the last 3 years and I will tell you that it is very difficult. Although she has her faculties, her short term memory is pretty bad. She had begged us not to send her to a nursing home because she wanted to stay in her home. The problem is that we all have full time jobs and actually we are all taking care of 2 homes. We do all the laundry, cleaning, grocery and other shopping, meal preparation, and dispense her medication. Sometimes we can't do what we want to do because it may be the night we are scheduled to take care of mom. Why do we do it...............because we love mom.

Dee

 

[NansXOXOX]

...Sometimes we can't do what we want to do because it may be the night we are scheduled to take care of mom. Why do we do it...............because we love mom.

Dee

Thanks, Dee. That's my point.

I wouldn't wish Alzheimer's or any of the diseases I had to go through with my parents on anyone. They are all devistating and can happen to anyone at anytime.

We do what we do because we love and (back on topic) that will be what motivates Plushenko in his relationship with his son.

 

[Ptichka]

From what I've seen my friends go through with their parents/ grandparents, I agree that advanced Alzheimer is the worst. Yes, I agree that we spend time helping our loved ones because they are our loved ones. Also, I think it's easier to take care of someone when they appreciate it, and when you can see your efforts bringing positive results. The problem is that after a person struggles with Alzheimer for a long time, their personality changes to the point where the child loves the memory of what their parent used to be before the desease rather than what they are now. I have an aunt whose mother now has Alzheimer. She tells her daughter on daily basis that she hates her, that she is ugly, and all kinds of other purposely hurtful things. My aunt has to keep reminding herself that it's the desease talking, not her mom; still, one must be a saint not to be affected by it.

 

[Zanzibar]

Ah Pitchka, thanks for your post. You really do get it.

I was the only one of my siblings that was able to spend Christmas Day with my Mom...and the only words she was able to muster to me were, "I'm going to kill you".

Thank god I was able to laugh about it. My Mom was (and inside still is) the most wonderful person in the world - and operated at genius level. But you're right that they become almost just a memory as the 'who they are' slips away every day.

Back to Plushy - I found it interesting that he had initially, at least according to his Mom apparently, wanted to name his son Sasha/Sashka...perhaps in part due to his friendship with Sasha Abt - cute name - also liked Christian. Egor (or Yegor/Igor) of course doesn't 'play' quite as well to the Western world, but perhaps it's popular in Russia. Evgeny Platov once told me he was sad upon moving to America to discover that the American version of his name - Eugene - was not very popular here - but that in Russia Evgeny was quite common. It is funny about names...

 

[Joesitz (RIP)]

hi Ptichka - I've been away for almost a week with old friends down in chilly Florida.

What I would like you to do some day in your spare time is to turn this whole thing into play and write it in the Checkov style. Former peasant now successful business man sheltering his beautiful but somewhat spoiled daughter who meets an honored but peasant background athlete. Their trials and tribulations ensue but the mystery is what part is the 'old man' playing in this drama? Is he the cause of it? Did he forget that he, too, was once a peasant? There are many in the cast to play with. Think about it

Joe

On another note, this may be the reason for Evgeni's lack of exhuberance in Torino.

Joe

 

[Kelly22]

I've seen my friend go through "terminal" Alzheimers with her mother and how spirit crushing it was for her. I think my father had exhibited signs of Alzheimers but passed away from a complication from a car accident before this disease took hold. I am terrified of it. It is the worse possible of all diseases, so I completely understand Zanzibar's point. At the same time, I also understand those who have older parents and are blessed with their wisdom. I think, ideally, it is best to have children earlier than later.

I'm glad to hear Plushy has a good heart. It's hard to know that from observing, as he doesn't wear his heart on his sleeve the way Yagudin does. I was sad for him because I thought he had a pretty tough life and had hoped that the marriage brought stability and happiness. Maybe he was just too young...